Thursday, April 30, 2009

The Village

Heroes often stop at villages throughout their journey. These stops are vital for obtaining supplies, as clearing houses for information and just connecting with people after long periods of isolation. Today I stopped at one of my favorite villages -- the office.

I had an appointment near the office and arranged my day so I could meet Kelly and Marion for lunch. I made a quick visit into the center to say hi to friends and co-workers. Everyone I spoke with was welcoming and warm. It was good see people like Brian and Randall, Deb and Paula, Debby and Susan, Beth, Linda and Deb, Cheryl, Paul, Nicole, Darrin and Mary...I'm sure I'm missing a few. I was drawing such a crowd at one point, I was afraid of distracting the associates. It is hard to believe it has been two months since I stopped work. I even got a chance to chat with Mark, who called Kelly while I was there.

Lunch was fun. There is a church near the office which operates a cafe. It started as an ice cream stand and grew from there. They make the best sandwiches using fresh fillings and their own homemade breads. The portions are generous and the iced tea is sweet. Marion just returned from chaperoning a Dreams Take Flight day in Disney. The program takes underprivileged children to Disney for the day. Yes, for the day. They leave Halifax at 3am and return at 3am the next day. Each child receives a t-shirt, shorts, sneakers, fanny pack, pocket cash, plus the flight down and passes for the rides, etc. Marion had tons of photos and stories from the trip.

This morning the FedEx man showed up at my door with a package. Inside was a soft yellow lamb and a purple dragonfly with glittery wings (he has a wingspan of about 12 inches). The box was from the Colorado crew. I sat the lamb on our home office desk where Cole eyed it intently for awhile. As I've mentioned before, Cole seems to think he has first right of refusal on all stuffed animals entering the premises.

Rob took advantage of the great spring weather and took the afternoon off to go fishing. He caught eight brook trout at a nearby river, the same one we fished last weekend.

The warm weather is also coaxing out the blooms on the forsythia bushes, and the redbud, lilac and potentillas are budding out as well. Unfortunately, the warm weather also seems to be waking up the black flies.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Chocolate is Good for the Soul

If it isn't already, it should be a book title -- Chocolate is Good for the Soul.

The Hero needs sustenance along his journey, and while some may say grains, vegetables and lean protein should make up the menu, for my money a little chocolate soothes the body and the spirit.

Today I received an extravagant gift basket from the local team (thank you Tammy for dropping it off), and you guessed it -- my chocolate cup overfloweth. There are some healthy oranges and apples in the basket which I will enjoy, but many of the other treats have a chocolate theme, and hey, scientists now say a little dark chocolate has health benefits.

The basket included a card signed by members of the team, each of them wishing me well and providing encouragement. As each day goes by work gets a little further away and my focus becomes more insular. It's nice to know people are keeping me in their thoughts and prayers. It seems many of them follow the blog and are keeping up-to-date on my progress that way.

I've been much more tired this time around than before. I'm not sure if it is the cumulative effects of three rounds of chemo, or if perhaps I pushed myself too hard and did too much because I didn't have the nausea this time. Yesterday I slept until 10, got up, laid on the couch, napped and was in bed by 10 and asleep not too long after that. I was quite cross because I didn't have the energy to take advantage of the beautiful weather. Today was a little better; although I still napped I was able to run the vacuum over the floors and put some dishes away. I had hoped to have the energy to walk Cole, but at this rate I barely have the energy to walk up and down stairs.

I also feel bloated and puffy. I'm guessing its the drugs, but even my face looks odd. Something to discuss at my next appointment.

I was feeling sorry for myself so I opened a gift from my joy box -- a bear dressed up as a rabbit, holding a banner saying "Hang in there baby!".

Today's mail had a card from Kathy E. As always her notes are beautiful and inspirational.

Planning is underway for the Relay for Life at work. As previously mentioned the teams are using the Hero's Journey as their theme. I puttered away at creating a poster today to promote the event and sent it to Kelly for input from the teams. I have a couple more ideas for posters, and will work on them tomorrow.

Can't believe the week is already half over and April is wrapping up. My daffodils are blooming and all the seeds I've planted have sprouted -- tomatoes, basil, lettuce, beets, spinach and cosmos. Now I just need the energy to clean up my flower beds.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Look Good Feel Better

Today was a busy day. I took advantage of one of the many programs available to women battling cancer and attended the "Look Good, Feel Better" workshop at the hospital. I'm wiped, but hey that doesn't take much any more, especially the Monday following treatment. And as I learned from one of the women sitting next to me, it could be worse...she says she is exhausted for a good week to 10 days after her chemo.

That's part of the of purpose of the workshop, to connect with others going through the same steps you're taking. The main goal is to help women adapt to the changes in their skin, hair and body which they may not know how to address. For example, I learned today that olive oil is not just for cooking, but makes a wonderful scalp massage oil to banish "cradle cap" or dry skin caused by losing your hair.

In addition, I walked away with a box full of skin care products, sunscreen, moisturizer, make-up and tips on how to use them. It is a worthwhile workshop for any woman going through cancer.

Checked the mail on the way home and had cards from my Dad's twin sister, Trudy, one from Ilene, and cards from two of Rob's aunts, Myrtle and Vivian, both of whom have been following my blog. Thank you ladies! I appreciate your warm thoughts and best wishes. I also received an email from Dad's older sister Joyce as well; she has been tested for the BRCA1 genetic mutation and fortunately doesn't carry it.

I signed up for an archery workshop in May. It is a Beyond BOW (Becoming an Outdoor Woman) experience building on a weekend retreat Kelly, Marion and I attended a couple of years ago. We had a blast and Kelly and I are going to take the archery course together. Hopefully I won't find it too strenuous, but I'm learning to take things at my own speed and not push myself too much.

Time to take a rest. It has been a busy day and I haven't even started to think about supper yet.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

First Fish of Spring

The benefit of good, effective drugs is taking advantage of a beautiful day like today. Rob and I took the dogs to a nearby river and cast out the fly lines for the first time this year. The stoneflies were hatching and Rob caught his first trout of the season.

Tess got bored with the whole affair and chewed her leash in half, which means she probably won't be allowed to go on any more fishing trips for a while.

I still tire easily and after an hour or so I was ready to head home. But it was enjoyable to be casting a fly into the stream. I don't normally get out this early in the year because I'm what we call a fair-weather fisherwoman.

Checked the mail last night and received another card from the Colorado team and a card from the administration team locally -- Beth, Linda and Deborah. Thanks ladies, it gave me a chuckle; I love The Cat in the Hat.

I also received a care package from Trudy -- seasons one through four of Sex and the City, a card from her, homemade cards from her daughters, some trashy romance novels and a "Thingamaboob" which is being sold as a cancer awareness fundraiser in her community. It is a key fob with beads representing the size of lumps women find on their own, versus what a doctor or a mammogram can detect. She also inlcuded a bar of really good chocolate. Thanks Trudy. Kelly and I are planning a "Sex and the City" Marathon next weekend, although the chocolate is already gone.

Friday, April 24, 2009

New Drugs, New Attitude

As the Hero makes his journey he often picks up better tools, armor and enhances his skills. For me this comes in the form of a new drug prescribed by my wonderful doctor, and in doubling the dose of anti-nauseants given before and during yesterday's chemo treatment. So far so good.

Last night I came home and curled up on the couch. I find the treatments always make me tired. However, I was able to eat and keep down two small pieces of pizza. I started out slowly, making sure the first stayed in place before ingesting the second...there's no need to waste pizza.

The headache is still a problem and I've been faithfully eating Tylenol to keep it under control. I also had a little heartburn this morning when I woke up so I took my Losec today and will continue for the next four or five days. If anyone is counting I had to take five pills this morning.

Overall I'm thrilled things are much better. Hopefully today continues along the same vein. If this keeps up I'll be able to enjoy the sunshine this weekend (although I have to keep covered up and slathered in sunscreen -- side-effect of one of the drugs is sun sensitivity.)

Had dinner with Paul on Wednesday, and got a call from Dave on Wednesday as well. He and Ang might come out this weekend if I'm feeling up to it. Rob received a card this week from Lisa and Kevin, just to let him know they're thinking of him too.

We also got an invitation to Rebecca's wedding, which is the weekend after my last chemo. The doctor says I should be fine to go, but if we discover the next treatments have adverse effects we may be able to postpone the last treatment until after the wedding.

Thanks everyone for your kind thoughts, support and prayers. It all is appreciated and welcomed.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Gearing Up for Round Three

Thursday marks the halfway point in my chemo treatment. In the context of the hero's journey, these treatments are comparable to a series of small crises the hero must face before reaching the inmost cave, where he grabs the elixir and prepares to head for home. He's halfway through his journey, but there are many more challenges, monsters and complications to face before he can be homeward bound.

For me each of these treatments is different. Fortunately, supporting me on this journey is a good team -- my doctor is doing what she can to make sure I sail through these challenges as easily as possible. Today at my pre-chemo appointment she wrote me a prescription for a new drug to see if we can avoid the nausea and vomiting which accompanied the last two rounds. However, this is the last round of this particular cocktail and even I if I have a bad reaction, hopefully it will be the final time I need to go through it. The next three sessions are a different type of drug, with a whole new array of side effects.

The good news is the tumors continue to shrink. She couldn't feel the one in my lymph nodes at all, and the one in my breast is now about a centimeter.

Today's mail contained four cards. There were three cards from work -- one from the crew in Colorado, one from Kelly in Kentucky (this would be Kelly A, as opposed to Kelly B who visits on a regular basis) and greetings from Ilene (my boss' boss). In addition, Diane G. from my home church also sent a card to let me know she's thinking of me. It's wonderful to open the mailbox and see it full of good wishes...much better than the bills and circulars which are the norm.

Rob and I decided to have supper out tonight and stopped at a sushi place on our way home from the hospital. The restaurant also serves up Thai food which I enjoy more than the sushi.

Tomorrow I'll get my new prescription filled, and maybe do some preemptive cleaning so I don't have to look at dust bunnies when I'm not feeling well. I may even start reading the Sue Grafton novel I picked up tonight. Who knows, maybe if I'm engrossed in a good book, the nausea might not even be an issue.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Quiet Days

Today is Sunday and as Kelly reminded me last evening, my most recent blog was Wednesday night. Time to write again. The week before chemo is my best week. I feel more energetic and less introspective which sometimes makes it a challenge to write. Besides, who wants to know I played Zelda on the Wii for hours at a time?

The week was quiet. I did receive a couple of cards on Thursday. One from Helen with the "Footprints in the Sand" poem and a disk to remind me I never walk alone, and one from the team in Colorado.

I've been taking advantage of the sunshine and planted some seeds in starter pots in my studio. So far I've planted tomato, cosmos, basil and spinach -- the spinach I'm trying in a window box outdoors. I plan to try some lettuce in a window box as well, that way I can hang it on the deck outside the kitchen where it cannot be run over by the dogs -- or worse.

I also started a new painting, which means I now have three pieces in various states of completion.

Yesterday Rob and I went to the driving range to hit a few golf balls. It was the first day out with the clubs he gave me for my birthday. Note to self...next time try a small or medium bucket of balls. The large bucket is too much for the first day of the season. I can feel every muscle in my body from my buttocks to my neck. It does feel good in a warped kind of way.

As alluded earlier, Kelly was out last night. I cooked my barbecue bruschetta and mixed feta cheese into the grilled peppers and tomatoes with outstanding results. Kelly brought out a cake from Pete's Frootique...lemon raspberry...very tasty. She also brought out the movie Twilight. We both read the book and enjoyed the movie adaptation. I think we were making Rob crazy with our comparisons, he told us at one point just to watch the movie. We're looking forward to seeing the next adaptation, although not as much as we're looking forward to the next Harry Potter movie.

I took advantage of yesterday's sunshine to finally take down my exterior Christmas lights and decorations. They're all packed away until next year. A little later than usual, but the chore is now complete and I can think about scraping the deck and prepping it for painting.

I think today, if the weather holds, we'll do some exploring. Rob is ready to look for some promising fishing spots and Cole is in need of a long walk. If the weather doesn't hold? Well, there's always another hour or two of Zelda, I'm a long way yet from finishing the game.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Hats and Cards

When I was first diagnosed with cancer, Rob worried we didn't have a strong enough support system around us where we live. We briefly discussed relocating for the duration of my illness, but decided it was even more important to be close to the hospital than to family. While it is true both sets of parents live quite a ways away and our friends are scattered all over the country, we have come to discover distance doesn't really factor into the equation and friends can always find ways to stay in touch.

Ian and June came out for a visit last night. Due to some staffing changes, Ian now works in the city and he and June try to stay at their city base at least one night a week. June cleaned out her closet and brought a bagful of hats and scarves for me. I wore a taupe-colored brimmed hat today when I took Cole for a walk in the park. Even though it was breezy the hat kept my head toasty warm. Gestures like this really mean a lot.

I received two packages in today's mail. One was from my Colorado teammates -- thanks! The package had two cards (one from the whole team and one from Kathy) and a lavender reed diffuser -- one of my favorite fragrances. You place reeds in the bottle of fragrant oil and oil is absorbed through the reeds and the fragrance released into the air.

The other package was from Bonnie at my Mom's church. It is a beautiful broach -- a fairy sitting on a leaf. The colors are gorgeous and it will add sparkle to any outfit. I can't wait to wear it!

We also received an Easter card from Rob's parents.

As I said our support system is wide-spread -- whether it is an email from Francine or Paul, a quick chat with Kelly (who listened to me rant about the ants in my dining room), a comment from Mark or a note from Mom tucked in with the package -- it is clear we have many people standing beside us, and thinking about us, during this battle. We appreciate it all.

And speaking of standing beside us, I had a request from work. Two teams are participating in the Relay for Life in June and one of the teams has asked if they can use "The Hero's Journey" as the theme. I said yes, as long as my picture didn't turn up on a T-shirt. Kelly and I created a logo for the team's consideration (no picture of me) and if I'm up to it I'll spend some time at the relay event and help with a fundraiser or two beforehand.

Today was beautiful and I took advantage of the warm sunshine to plant some spinach in one of my window boxes. I need to pick up some more soil so I can plant some lettuce, start tomato seedlings and coax some basil to sprout. Hopefully the rest of the week is as nice, and Cole and I can do some more walking -- he is just crazy full of energy.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Quiet Weekend

Easter weekend has been pretty quiet. Usually we would visit either one set of parents or the other, but we determined we would stay pretty close to home to be on the safe side. My white blood cell count is bottoming out right about now, and we don't want to run the risk of me picking up an infection and needing to go to an emergency room outside of the city.

We took the dogs for a short hike on Friday. Both of them needed the exercise.

On Sunday Rob and I took a drive. Later in the day Kelly and her son, Jody, came out for supper and a visit. Jody entertained us on his guitar. He's quite a talented player and it was an enjoyable way to spend an evening.

This morning we watched snowflakes dash across the yard in a brisk wind. You'd think by mid-April winter would pack up its bags and move on. It is a good afternoon for curling up and reading, which may be the way I spend the rest of my day.

The Gram's Shave-off has now raised $2,100. Way to go ladies!

Friday, April 10, 2009

The Genetic Twist

Sometimes a Hero is born for a specific challenge. It doesn't make their job any easier or more appealing. In fact they too will refuse the call -- few want to face the tests and the enemies, and no one wants to go to the Inmost Cave and face the Ordeal. However, when the Hero is born for the task, there is no way to avoid it.

I had an appointment at the Maritime Genetic Centre yesterday, where I met with a genetic counsellor to start the process of determining whether I carry a genetic mutation known as BRCA1. This mutation has been linked to a significant increase in the risk of developing breast and ovarian cancer ("BRCA" stands for breast cancer). Knowing whether I have this genetic mutation will help when I make surgery choices. Many women with BRCA1 opt for preemptive surgery and have not only the impacted breast completely removed, but also the unaffected breast and ovaries -- significantly reducing their chances of redeveloping cancer.

The first step was having my blood drawn. The Genetic Centre is at the IWK, and you would think people who take blood from children all the time would be better at it (at least that was my thought). Not so. This was the worst experience I've had of someone drawing blood. It hurt. She missed the vein and it felt like she was poking around with her needle. I've had so many health care professionals compliment me on my prominent veins that I know this has nothing to do with my veins being too deep or hard to find.

The blood sample will go to either a lab here in Halifax or one in Montreal where they will look at the DNA sequencing. The sequence is represented by a string of letters -- TCCGGGTAA, etc. When they examine my DNA they already know (based on findings in a paternal aunt) they are looking for "AAdel" or an area in the gene where an AA sequence is missing. The DNA strands are very long and the process can take months to complete. In fact it is very rare to have the results available for someone making decisions about surgery, because surgery is often the first step in the process. Because my treatment plan was reversed, it is working in my favor. The normal wait time just to get an appointment at the Centre is 1-2 months, but I lucked out and got one almost immediately because they had a cancellation.

I received two cards in yesterday's mail. Once from the Southville Church of Christ and one from former neighbours of Rob -- Irma and Vernie.

I found yesterday exhausting -- information overload is my guess, and not sleeping well Wednesday night. I tried napping but was too restless; as a result I crashed last night. With the sun shining and Rob off work today, I'm looking forward to taking the dogs on an easy walk -- maybe along one of the rail beds.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Dark Chocholate and Old Friends

The Hero needs sustenance along his journey. Sustenance isn't just about feeding the body, it's also about feeding the soul.

Today, Cole and I walked to the mailboxes at the end of the subdivision. I received a package from Aunt Pat in the mail -- packages of dark chocolate Easter eggs and a funny little angel. The dark chocolate for both the mind and body (dark because science has proven it is better for us) and the angel for the soul. Thank you, as you intended you brightened my day.

In addition I received two cards today -- one from the Tiverton Ladies Group and one from Lisa. Lisa included a sparkly body decal, inspiration for the soul in the form of a big vibrant flower (which I think I'll paste to my bald head as soon as the rest of the hair is gone).

My old pal Kevin called today. We went to university together and worked at the same paper at one time. It was really good to reconnect and catch up. We've both travelled to the same European cities and it was fun to compare notes. He and his wife, Leslie, have invited us to join them at their summer house and I'm hoping things work out so we can. It's the perfect summer place, very rural, very casual and the food and company are always excellent.

I heard back regarding the genetic testing today as well. I got a call this morning from a genetic counsellor indicating I'd get a package of information in the mail and then an appointment. Then this afternoon I got a call saying there was a cancellation and asking if I could make it for an appointment in the morning. So tomorrow I meet with a doctor and a genetic counsellor at the IWK. The genetic testing is apparently quite complex and can take months; to obtain results before my surgery will mean expediting the process somewhat.

Rob and I went out for supper tonight. No reason in particular except I was craving a really good Caesar salad. We went to the Vines, which we both agree makes the best Caesar in the city (not that I've tried them all, but I don't see how any could compare). Of course I have enough food left over for a snack tonight, lunch tomorrow and maybe even a second snack.

Hopefully the wind will drop tomorrow, the sun will shine and I'll be able to take Cole to the park. He's a little wound up these days; not quite enough exercise and a healthy dose of spring fever. He's not alone.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Heroes in all Shapes and Sizes

Heroes come in all kinds of different forms. It could be the person who gives up their seat on the bus, or the clerk who provides an extra level of customer service. In today's blog the Heroes I want to talk about are my Mom and her minister, Rev. Barb.

On Sunday, these two women sat down and had their hair cut off for cancer. Rev. Barb started the ball rolling about two years ago (her own daughter has beaten cancer) and Mom started growing her hair in support. I don't think she ever really thought it would get long enough to donate. This is the longest I've ever seen her hair in my life; she's always worn it close-cropped. While Mom stopped short of shaving her head, Rev. Barb went all the way. As one bald woman to another, you have a lovely shaped head Rev. Barb.

The deed was done at the church hall with a good crowd of witnesses (including Wally and his family) and through the three congregations, and additional donations, hundreds of dollars -- plus two heads of hair -- was raised for the Cancer Society. Well done ladies.

Today's weather was driving me crazy. I finally loaded Cole into the truck and drove into the village to pick up some seeds. If I start something green inside, maybe I'll feel like spring is on its way. I shouldn't complain though. I just got off the phone after chatting with Dad for a while. He's in the Yukon working and they have 16-foot snowbanks where he is. He says they push the snow piles around to encourage them to melt faster. Of course, once they melt, then they have to wade through the muck. Fortunately the rain has washed away all the snow here.

One plus side about the weather, I decided it was a perfect day for baking bread. I made two loaves of whole grain bread and played video games...what a way to pass an afternoon. The bread was the perfect accompaniment for the corn chowder I made. What can I say, when my appetite is good, I want good eats.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Cold-Headed

Heroes often gain new tools (or in the case of video game heroes, new armour or weapons) as they gain strength or skills. Today I donned new head gear.

It turns out having very little hair is a cold proposition. I have a hat, but found the seaming was bothering my now naked head. Rob rummaged through the basket in the hall closet where the hats and scarves reside and started picking out options for me. I discarded several candidates has having too high a wool content, or being too wintry, until he pulled out a long silk scarf that had belonged to my grandmother.

Who knows how old this treasure is; its tag says it was "Made in England Expressly for The English Shop, Calgary, Canada." Its bright red and white paisley print were cheerful, the width was enough to cover my scalp and the material soft enough not to cause irritation. I wore it on my head when we took a drive out to the video store. We have gotten into the habit of buying previously viewed movies and picked up "Atonement" and "Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day". We also stopped at Dairy Queen...I had a hankering for brownies and ice cream.

Today's mail included a card from Rob's parents and one from the Zimmermans -- Mr. Zimmerman is a former pastor from Rob's church. Also had calls from Trudy and Kelly, and opened the Day 4 gift from Debbie's box -- a pair of fancy red slippers covered with jewels.

Overall, I felt back to my old self today, except for being famished. As was the case the last time, after it gets past the nausea, my body seems to want to fuel up on the missed food. I can't seem to stop eating.

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Bald is Beautiful

The Hero often needs to push himself in new directions, reassess his values, embrace change. And so it was I took the drastic step today of asking Rob to shave my head.

The constant shedding was really beginning to get to me. I could no more than touch my scalp and my hand would come away covered in hair. It was becoming patchy and I'm afraid there are 90-year-old men out there with better coverage than I have. You could say I now have the G.I. Jane look.

I'll post a picture when the light is a little better, and I have some make-up on. Rob tried to take a few photos today and I can only assume the by the fact he did not let me see them that they are not very favorable. I do appreciate his discretion in the matter. He thinks I'm cute with my shaved head, although admits it probably isn't the best long-term look.

Wally and Jen arrived home at 3 a.m. today. I conceded and let Rob go to the airport himself. When the alarm went off I just I had no energy. Just as well, as their flight was delayed by 45 minutes. They enjoyed Cuba and it was nice to hear about their trip; they really liked the resort and said the nightly entertainment was first-class. They both came home sporting tans and looking well-rested.

James, my youngest brother, called tonight. It was good to hear from him, as he has been decidedly quiet since I learned of the diagnosis. As the most sensitive of my siblings (no offence Wally, you have your own attributes), he simply did not know how to handle my news or know how to discuss it. Now that hurdle is past, hopefully he'll remember to just drop me a note from time to time, or send me a silly joke or whatever.

I felt tentative this morning, but breakfast stayed where it belonged and I started to feel more myself by lunch time. Rob went and picked up a few groceries this afternoon, selecting special treats to entice my appetite -- which has worked remarkably well. I love food, and it is annoying to not be able to enjoy it. Rob also spoiled me by returning with flowers, a magazine and a movie from his outing.

Must go cuddle with my Number One Guy. I think there's a movie on to watch. It's been a little chilly and damp and a good weekend for movies -- we already watched "Pride and Prejudice" and "Sense and Sensibility" this weekend.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

On the Mend

Sometimes the Hero needs to take it easy after a battle. He's a little worse for wear and he just needs to accept he may not be quite as strong as he believed.

Today started off with another session clinging to the toilet. It irritates me, this nausea and vomiting. It is out of character and out of the scope of my existence. I've vomited more in the past three weeks than in the previous 20 years.

Having said that, I'm feeling much better this evening. After hanging out in my pajamas all day I finally dressed and Rob took me for a drive in the sunshine. We stopped and I got a Mint Smartie Blizzard for a treat.

Checked the mail while we were out and I received an inspiring card from Francine. It's beautiful and thoughtful. Thank you.

Wally and Jen return tonight. Rob will pick them up at the airport at 2:45 a.m. He insists I need my rest and won't let me go with him. Hopefully they had a great trip. I think we'll start planning something for when this is all over.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Feeling Somewhat Human

I'm finally starting to feel human again. As Rob alluded, the past 24 hours have been somewhat challenging. So far I'm managing to keep my lunch down which (aside from a few crackers) is a first since I got back from treatment yesterday.

The Cancer Center really goes out of its way to try to make patients (and families) feel better -- both physically and emotionally. They have hot and cold beverages available all the time and little snack packages of cookies and crackers. Plus, yesterday while I was receiving treatment, a lovely lady came around offering sandwiches. They make a pretty good chicken on whole wheat over there (which is a good thing, as it was the last food I was able to keep down). The Cancer Centre was also giving patients candle holders bearing inspirational messages, courtesy of Lawtons and Seagull Pewter.

I received a card yesterday from Kathy in Tiverton. She is a friend of Rob's sister and has been keeping me in her thoughts and prayers. A cancer survivor herself, she provides a lot of inspiration.

I also opened a couple of the gifts from Debbie's Joy Box. I opened one last night when I was feeling crappy (my very own light sabre -- something with which to poke Cole), and the Day 2 gift, a book of short stories. Both gifts did what they were designed to do...make me smile.

Also in the good news column, Sun Life approved my short-term disability claim this week and we received the first payment yesterday. At least that bit of stress and uncertainty has been taken care of.

Just talked with Kim. Had a nice chat. She's planning on coming home in May, so hopefully we'll be able to connect at that time.

Just about ready to head back to the couch...considering napping again. I find the chemo knocks me off my feet for a couple of days. Let's hope that means it's knocking the cancer off its feet permanently.

Thanks again to everyone, for your ongoing thoughts and prayers and supportive comments. I appreciate it all.

Busy Battling...

Hi everyone,

It's Rob, posting on behalf of Sue. I can see from the hit counter that everyone's waiting for an update on yesterday's chemo, so I thought I'd bring you up to speed. As was the case last time, the chemo session itself was uneventful, and she felt fine afterward. But like last time, and despite a slight change in the chemo cocktail -- designed to prevent a repeat performance, things went downhill quickly a few hours after we got home. Suffice it to say it was a little rough last night and this morning, and Sue isn't feeling much like blogging (or doing much of anything) right now. Hopefully later in the day she'll be up and around and able to blog about it herself. For now, please keep sending her your positive thoughts and, for those of you so inclined, your prayers.

Thanks so much for accompanying us on this journey. It means a lot to both of us.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

More Tests and Preparation


The Hero often has to face many different tests before reaching his goal. In the Wizard of Oz for example, Dorothy has to help the Lion, the Tin Man and the Scarecrow, and fight a witch before she finds the answers she seeks. In the end she possessed the secret all along.

My oncologist has suggested genetic testing to see if my DNA can provide the answer to why I have cancer. After I was diagnosed, my mother unearthed an old letter from my dad's sister. It indicated that she carried a genetic mutation known as BRCA1, discovered after she developed a rare type of uterine cancer. I took the letter with me to my appointment yesterday. Today my oncologist called to say there is no charge for the testing and we agree it would be beneficial to know if I carry the mutation.

There are two pieces here -- the pathology reports came back indicating my cancer doesn't fit into two main categories of breast cancer (those which feed and grow on hormones or those which feed and grow on a type of protein). If my cancer fell into either category it would mean additional drug therapies for the next year or more to minimize the chance of recurrence. If it turns out I do have the BRCA1 or BRCA2 mutation, then I may want to consider pre-emptive surgery (double mastectomy and the removal of my ovaries) to lower the odds of the cancer coming back.

I will have the test done before my chemo is complete so we know exactly what we're facing when it comes time to make decisions about surgery. Some people are reluctant to have this type of genetic testing done because it could impact their ability to obain disability or life insurance if they test positive. But hey, I have cancer, so I won't be qualifying for any new disability or life insurance policies anytime soon anyway.


As promised (threatened), I had my hair cut today. I've never worn it this short. Kelly's sister, Deanna, is my hairstylist and she did an awesome job. It is still falling out and I will end up with no hair, but in the meantime this is a good transition for me.

Speaking of Kelly, we met and had supper in Lower Sackville. I think we've finally found a Chinese restaurant with food we both like.

Received good news from Sun Life today; my short-term disability claim was approved for the full 17 weeks. I will have to apply for long-term disabilty eventually, but not right away. The initial claim takes me through chemo, but I won't be ready to go back to work at that point -- not with surgery and radiation to follow.

My second round of chemo is at 10 tomorrow. I'm as prepared as I can be. I filled my prescription for heartburn medicine, plus I bought ginger ale, ice cream and chicken noodle soup. If I'm going to feel like I have a bad case of the flu, I'm going to treat it the same way. So, as any good Hero should, I've done what I can to prepare for the next skirmish.