Home Again

It is so good to be home again. I got home early this afternoon and immediately curled up on the couch and slept. Last night I was interrupted regularly from sleeping by the nurses and the helicopter landing on the roof.

Overall, feeling pretty good. A little tired, a little gassy, a little sore. I've been taking Extra Strenght Tylenol to control the discomfort.

Thank you to everyone for your good thoughts and best wishes. I received a card from Gale Gal Joyce yesterday.

I'll write more in a few days...I'm ready to curl up on the couch again.

Surgery over. All is well.

Hey folks, Rob here.

Sue is out of surgery and recuperating at the IWK. It took them about 45 minutes this morning just to find a viable vein to start the anesthetic IV, and she bled a little more than expected, so between those two things her surgery didn't end until around 1:00 or so. They were supposed to start at 8:45 and be done by noon, so by the time the surgeon came out to talk to me I was starting to climb the walls of the waiting room. However, she said everything went well and there was no visual evidence of any abnormalities to worry about. I'm assuming they'll take some tissue samples and do a path report, but I may be wrong on that.

Sue looked *much* better when they brought her up to her room than she looked after her first surgery. No nausea either. They suppposedly gave her some motion sickness meds before moving her upstairs, and she kept her eyes closed as well to try and head off any vertigo.

Barring any setbacks she'll be able to come home tomorrow, hopefully in the morning.

Thanks to all of you who sent thoughts, prayers and best wishes!

Phase 2

In the morning I'll have surgery again. This time to prevent possible development of cancer down the road. The BRCA1 gene makes me more susceptible to developing ovarian cancer than the average person. Because science has yet to develop a reliable test I'm opting to remove my ovaries and uterus in an effort to mitigate the risk.

My surgery is expected to take about three hours. I'm having a laproscopic assisted hysterectomy and I expect to hospitalized one night.

I had lunch will Kelly and Marion today, finished and assignment for my course, did some laundry, picked up a few groceries and I'm making a turkey for supper (so we'll have leftovers for a few days). I should be vacuuming the house as well...but I've run out of energy.

We attended a funeral for Rob's uncle Ken this week. All of his aunts were fussing over me and wishing me the best of luck for tomorrow. Hey, anything I can do to distract them from the loss of their brother.

Rob will update my blog, just as he did when I had my last surgery. I'll try to get on by the weekend, but no promises.

One Year

A year ago today I had my first appointment at the Cancer Center. I started chemo two days later. I can't believe it has been a year.

A lot has happened during that time. Surprisingly a lot of it was good. I may have lost my hair to the disease, but it has grown back. Now I have curls, which is a novelty and I look pretty good in short hair. In fact my new driver's licence photo may be the best one I've ever had taken.

I've grown closer to family and friends...this may be evidenced by the 154 cards I received and the numerous trinkets and gifts.

I've learned to cherish the small moments as well as the big ones.

I got to participate in Casting for Recovery.

After more than 50 trips across the city I appreciate the fact that I live here and didn't have to drive into the capital from eleswhere in the province. However, after all of this I very much want to move back to the country where I have space to grow a garden and room to roam.

I appreciate the fact that I have a good drug plan. Out of pocket I paid $145.25 for my various prescriptions. Less than I paid for parking which came in around $190.

Yesterday I had a follow-up appointment with my radiation oncologist. He is very pleased with my progress and won't need to see me again. Follow-up from here on in can be done by my family doctor and my surgeon.

Really?

Who could imagine that after the year I've had I can be checked twice a year by my family doctor and once a year by my surgeon? Shouldn't I have monthly blood work? Scans? Tests? But no; no blood work, no tests, no scans. Check ups are basic and consist mostly of examining my chest wall for signs of lumps. It is a little scary. I don't want to go through this ever again.

My doctor says it will probably take a year for my skin to completely recover from radiation. It is still discolored (it looks like I was in the sun and my shirt had a big hole in it). The area on my neck where the skin blistered is still itchy and he says it will continue to be for awhile.

Tomorrow starts the next little chapter of my adventure. I attend a pre-surgery clinic for my hysterectomy. The main event is scheduled for next Wednesday (March 10).

Notes from the Road

They say every cloud has a silver lining. It took a long time for me to see the silver lining of having cancer (and frankly I think the silver lining idea is a bit tarnished) but one of the benefits was qualifying for Casting for Recovery. This program provides cancer survivors with an opportunity to meet other individuals battling or recovering from the disease as well as learn a new skill. Fly fishing is a wonderful, relaxing sport which provides exercise, an opportunity to be in the outdoors and a chance to participate in an activity which can be done pretty much anywhere there is water.
Ten women were selected to participate in the most recent Casting for Recovery event and we were flown from Toronto to Bermuda earlier this month.

While away I kept a few notes which I'll share below.

February 12
Today we arrived in Bermuda. The sun broke through the clouds as we exited the airport. The water here is turquoise -- the most beautiful shade of blue I've ever seen.
We drove across the Island and after posing for a group picture at the "Unfinished Church" we stopped for lunch at the restaurant Indigo. It was very good and offered a wide array of dishes from local seafood to Indian cuisine. I ordered a thin-crust pizza with pineapple and shrimp.
We spent the rest of the afternoon at a mystical spot known as the Crystal Caverns. The words "Simply Incredible" do not do the caves justice. Even here, hundreds of feet below the surface the water is an incredible aqua blue. The cave ceiling drips with stalactites which were met with stalagmites growing up from the floor. The water was twenty feet deep in places and crystal clear. The underwater crystals reminded me of the corals found in aquariums. It takes a hundred years for one of the skinniest crystals to grow six inches. Most of the structure in the cave was hundreds of thousands of years old.
A floating boardwalk allowed us to walk through the caves. In the past people explored it by boat. Our leader guided us through a session of meditation. We shared how this trip had shaped/affected us. Then we sat quietly with the stillness of the cave working its magic on our souls. A cat lives at the site and it sat in my lap purring as I breathed in the purifying air of the cavern. The sound of water gently lapping the boardwalk and dripping from the ceiling was the only other noise which disturbed the quiet. It was the perfect way to unwind after the hustle of travel.
We ate a late supper at a restaurant not far from our hotel. I had fish soup and bruschetta. The soup is quite different from anything I've had before and is a dark broth-based soup.
Our room is lovely. The bathroom is very luxurious. The bed was a king and we had to have housekeeping come and split it apart and remake it to give myself and my roommate our own sleeping area.
I don't think I'll have any trouble going to sleep tonight.

February 13
Today we received a special Casting for Recovery pin at breakfast. These pins are fashioned like a salmon or trout fly and will serve as a reminder of our trip for years to come.
The winds were howling today and precluded us from doing any casting. We ended up touring the island by taxi. We had hoped to take a ferry from one end to the other but the winds were so strong the ferry stopped running. We toured the old naval yard which has been transformed into shops and tourist attractions. Here we took turns standing in the tip of the Bermuda Triangle. The old building have been retrofitted and one portion is used as a glassblowing workshop. They make stunning pieces there working with colours which are reflective of the local landscape -- crystal clear blues, pale pinks, vibrant greens and deep glossy black.
At lunch we ate a place called Bernard's. I ordered the jerked chicken wrap. It was delicious. They served it with fries and salad. Now that's my kind of place -- catering to both my sensible and impractical sides.
I purchased a book about a woman who moved to the Island "Tea with Tracey". I started reading it but I'm too tired to go on.
Supper was at the same restaurant as the previous evening. I shared a pizza with one of the ladies.
We wrapped up our evening with a candle-light meditation (for lack of a better word) where we had time to reflect. We were asked to share to adjectives friend and family would use to describe us. It was really lovely.
I received a copy of "What a Catch" featuring Kathryn fishing in South Africa.

February 14
Valentine's Day. This damned Bermuda weather. The wind was still blowing this morning and safety reasons kept us from fishing. We kept waiting and waiting for the wind to die. Fortunately it was sunny. We decided to call our group the Gale Girls in honor of the weather.
We did have our first lesson this morning. After breakfast we returned to the hotel where Kathryn went over the basics -- the difference between fly fishing and spin casting. She talked about rod weight, line types, reels, leaders, tippet and backing. We then practiced our casting loops with short rods and orange yarn in the breezeway outside the rooms.
Lunch was at the restaurant Rustico -- it is my favorite place yet. I had the salad which was greens with scallops, shirmp, tender pieces of beef and succulent morsels of chicken. This was topped with shredded parmesean and tossed with a champagne vinegrette. I was feeling virtuous after the salad (which was divine) and ordered cheesecake and cappuchino. I'm sure I've gained back the weight I lost before the trip...but for this meal it was worth it.
This afternoon we went to the aquarium and zoo. They have these huge tanks full of fish indigenous to the area. I was like a child in a candy shop...moving from tank to tank I snapped photo after photo knowing only a handful will turn out. It was as close to being underwater with the fish as a person could get without getting wet.
When we finished the wind had dropped from a gale to a brisk breeze and we took out a rod and practiced casting in the driveway of the aquarium while we waited for our taxis. Kathryn tied our wrists to the rod to help each of practice the drop and pick up cast with proper form.
We stopped at Kathryn's home earlier in the day to do some beachcombing and tonight we returned to end our day with a pizza party and watch a documentary she made.
We all recieved hats and lanyards today. I wrapped up my evening by sharing a cup of tea with a couple of the ladies. On my way back to my room I noticed the clouds had cleared off and the sky was studded was stars. Hopefully tomorrow will dawn sunny and calm.

February 15
Our last day on the island. I don't know where the time has disappeared. Today we finally got to practice casting on water. We went back to Kathryn's beach where there is an old saltwater pool. It was still breezy and none of us had enough practice to actually cast with a hook on the line. But that's okay. I'm more interested in getting my form correct than I am at catching fish at this point. I was doing well enough with the basic cast that Kathryn suggested I practice roll casts, false casts and shooting the line. I ended up tucking my rod in my sleeve because I was "breaking" my wrist. It's something I'll have to work on when I return home. Already I feel more confident in my casts. They're more accurate and straight. I can't wait to get home and practice with my own rod.
When we finished casting we hurried to the airport. It was time to leave. I'm tired. We flew to Toronto and then my roomie and I had a lay-over before flying back to Nova Scotia. By the time I got home it was after 11.
I can't begin to express how much I've enjoyed my sojourn. Looking back, it certainly follows the framework of the Hero's Journey. I left my comfort zone, met new mentors, learned a new task and returned home with a new skill I need to learn to understand and practice.
My thanks to those who made the trip possible and blessings on the woman who particpated with me.

February Update

It's hard to believe it was a year ago when I started this journey. The journey started with my annual check up, which led to the mammogram and biopsy. The rest as they say, is history.

Today I finally got word on the next phase of the journey. Once again the Hero must must face new tests and challenges this time in the form of more surgery. On March 10 I'll have my oophorectomy and hysterectomy to remove the ovaries, fallopian tubs and uterus. This is to decrease my risk of developing ovarian cancer which is higher than average because of the BRCA1 gene.

I am scheduled to attend a pre-admission clinic on March 3 where I'll get all the details and instructions. I'll be glad to get this phase behind me and concentrate on getting back to work. I've been talking with my claims adjuster and we're looking at a slow and gradual return to the workplace. I'll probably start with only part days to begin with.

I recently attended a lympodema clinic where I learned how to manage risk-factors related to the disease. I also had base measurements taken and added to my file. The width of my arms was measured in several different places and a visual inspection of my chest, shoulders and back was also done.

Today I also had to renew my driver's licence. Fortunately my hair has grown back quite well. It is possible the picture on my licence is one of the best I've ever had taken. I can't believe how many people say the short hair suits me and I should keep it...Maybe I should. Let's face it, having a good photo on your licence is next to impossible.

Meanwhile the countdown is on...10 days and I'm on my way to Bermuda. I'm hoping for sunny days and lots of good fishing for the Casting for Recovery trip.

The Silver Lining

Having cancer was not on my life "to do" list. However, as with many bad experiences there is a silver lining. Last year I applied for and was selected to take part in a fly-fishing workshop, Casting for Recovery. This four-day event was originally scheduled for October in Ontario. Unfortunately the H1N1 flu put a temporary hold on the event. Organizers were worried about women with compromised immune systems travelling and potentially becoming ill.

The good news is the event is rescheduled for February and will take place in Bermuda. I'll leave Halifax on February 11 and fly to Toronto where I'll meet the rest of the group. From there we'll fly to Bermuda, where we'll stay at the Elbow Beach Resort near Hamilton. I'll be home again on February 15.

Rob will have to spend Valentine's Day by himself, but as he so wittingly points out it isn't as though we do much on the holiday made up by candy and card companies.

I don't yet know what we'll be fishing or what other activies we may be doing. I'll get a complete package in the mail this week. Regardless, I'm looking forward to a brief mid-winter break.